We live in a twisted world. Millions of people don’t have enough to eat, yet industrialised farming is destroying the planet. Greed brought the so-called developed world to the brink of financial apocalypse, yet we continue to revel in our own sordid gluttony.
Hence Man v Food, Epic Meal Time, Pimp That Snack, and, y’know, Americans in general.
Admittedly, most of us aren’t exactly surviving by foraging for worms and harvesting the moss from the side of our garden sheds, but sometimes you’ve just got to wonder where all this calorific craziness is going to end.
For now, though, making food ridiculously big and eating far too much of it isn’t just socially acceptable; it’s celebrated! Gorging yourself into a carb-induced delirium is de rigueur, whether you like it or not.
Anyway, let’s get down to business. The 8 record breaking foods that follow will either fill you with guilt and disgust or have your stomach rumbling with desire. Or maybe a bit of both.
World’s Biggest Doner
A record-breaking doner kebab has just been created in Turkey. It was 2.5m tall, weighed over a tonne, and contained 7 cows. Scotland are working on the deep-fried version.
World’s Biggest Burger
An 84kg burger was crafted in Michigan last year. Holy cow.
World’s Biggest Pizza
A 37.4m wide pizza was baked in South Africa in 1990. Dough-comas (aka domas) ensued.
World’s Biggest Pad Thai
This 250kg concoction was brought into existence in Bangkok back in 2004. Actually looks quite tasty.
World’s Longest Sandwich
A 722m ‘sandwich’ was fashioned in Lebanon in 2004. Looks more like a wrap but it’ll do.
World’s Longest Noodle
A 1,704m noodle was produced in China last year. Useful.
World’s Biggest Chocolate Bar
Reppin’ for the UK, Thornton’s came up with this 6-tonne monster last year. So far there’s no sign of it in our local store.
World’s Biggest Cheesecake
This 2-tonne tribute to sugary excess took 55 Mexican cooks 60 hours to create. Fantastico.